How to tackle a workaholic boss and come out winning

This is the second in an occasional series of posts for people in corporate jobs. During the series I’ll be talking about some of the challenges you face in the current economic environment, and giving you some pointers for dealing with them in ways that allow you a more positive and life-sustaining experience.

This post is about the re-emergence of workaholic bosses: men and women in senior positions putting in all the hours as they try to prove their indispensability to their businesses.

Sadly, this kind of behaviour is endorsed by the corporate world as being okay, even positively good. But being on the receiving end of it can be tough. Workaholics can often expect you to mimic their 24/7 lifestyle and be heavily critical if you don’t. And, because their moods and attention to detail can be all over the map, they can be inconsistent in their treatment of you. It’s not atypical for a workaholic boss to parade you as the blue-eyed employee one day, and ball you out for being the weakest link the following.

If this description fits your boss, how can work with him (I’m using the masculine today) in a way that supports your well-being and protects the longevity of your employment?

Get job role clarity

With redundancies on one hand, and a need to respond to the market on the other, it’s likely that your department numbers have shrunk, but the tasks you collectively need to deliver have increased. What’s your job now? If you are unclear, write yourself a simple description of what you see as being your key tasks. Beyond that, write down what results you believe you need to deliver and by when. Then, pin your boss down for half an hour, and get his agreement that you’re focussing on what he wants you to focus on. In a world of shifting goal posts, you’ll thank me for having taken this step.

Make your boss manage

When the pressure’s on and you start to panic that you’re not going to be able to do all that’s expected of you, you need to take your concern to your boss and let him make the decision on what gets priority. “We agreed that my task was to follow up with the people who responded to our email campaign. Now you’re telling me to run focus groups. I cannot do both in the time you’re setting. Which one do you want me to do?”

You can use a similar approach for something that he’s delegated to you as a sure fire success, but you can see is failing. Don’t wait till it fails before you say anything: take it to him, along with clear reasons for your concerns, and any ideas for changing direction and give him a “heads-up”. Then ask him what he wants you to do.

Ditto the scenario where you can’t progress one of your agreed priorities because a colleague or another department is not playing ball. Take the dilemma to him to unblock the bottle neck.

Deliver kick-ass results

This is obvious, but I’m going to say it anyway. You gain personal power, not least in your own mind, by turning in the kind of results you committed to. Commit to yourself to do the best job you can do. Just do them on your terms.

Keep a confident, assertive outlook throughout

The workaholic swings between being a spoiled child and a punishing parent. Don’t get hooked into responding to these emotional places, by making sure you stay in a grown-up, assertive place. Watch the tone and pace of your voice. Never make excuses or defend yourself. By the same token, keep your cool and don’t lose your temper with him.

Decide your own approach to working hours

You do have choice. You don’t need to be swept away in the frenzy of overtime that seems to be going on. Remember that less is more. You’ll get more done by being very focussed during the time you’re actually at work, and balancing that with time away from work, than you will by being a slave to your desk. You may decide that it would be politic to work later on a couple of evenings. That’s up to you. The point is to make sure that you’re in charge of figuring this out for yourself.

Network with other managers you respect in the business

Look out for other managers in the business whom you admire. Find ways to have them informally mentor you. Give them visibility, without being critical, of some of the challenges you face with Mr Workaholic. Ask for their coaching on key, difficult issues. Apart from allowing you to feel supported, this gives them a separate picture of you to the one your boss may paint in important management discussions.

Give more not less attention to life outside of work

When your workaholic boss is jangling your insecurities, there’s a tendency to make work the most important thing in your life. Unfortunately, this plays right into his hands, because then he’s feeding off your vulnerabilities. You hang around working hard, waiting and hoping that he’ll give you some positive recognition. You become dependent on him for feeling OK about yourself. That just reinforces his shitty behaviour.

To avoid this, do something that’s counter-intuitive and give even more attention than normal to friends, family, hobbies and interests outside of work. Ground yourself by spending time with people and things that feed and nourish you psychologically; that let you know you’re OK just as you are.

Stand firm if your boss has a hissy fit at you for not colluding with him

The challenge of not rolling over and playing dead is that it can upset your boss. For sure, what’s at the heart of the upset is that you’re questioning his implicit need for control. Don’t worry about it. That’s his issue, not yours.

He may criticise you for “not being a team player”, or for being a bit soft because you’re choosing to have a life. The bullying way he does this may make you shake in your shoes, but the trick is not to let him see he’s affecting you and stand your ground. Take everything back to your job role and deliverables and when the criticism comes look him in the eye and say, “which of my results are you unhappy with?”

Related posts:

1. A Comprehensive Guide To Slaying Your Vampire Boss
2. 7 Warning Signs That It’s Time To Quit Your Job
3. Lost heart with your current job? Don’t rush to escape
4. The Shocking Truth About Corporations