The 10 smartest things you can do to get the most from your next team building off-site

This is the first in an occasional series of posts for people in corporate jobs. During the series I’ll be talking about some of the challenges you face in the current economic environment, and giving you some pointers for dealing with them in ways that allow you a more positive and life-sustaining experience.

Today I’m talking about the equally loved as hated team building events that seem to be resurfacing as businesses regroup after the chaos of the last couple of years. When times were good you turned up to these days with hope, said your piece and went away feeling hungover, but bonded. These days, post the redundancies that ripped through your department and caused you to wonder if you could ever trust your boss again, chances are you’re feeling more cagey and reticent about spending two days locked in a hotel room with your colleagues.

So, how can you turn it into a positive 48 hours for yourself?

1. Decide to turn up. Instead of spending days and hours resenting the thing, and exhausting yourself by being there in body but not in mind, put your resentment aside and make a firm decision to be wholly present. You’re a big girl or boy now. You can choose how you want this time to be for you.
2. Set your expectations appropriately. Approach the whole event with a degree of healthy curiosity. Rather than being unrealistically hopeful and feel gutted when your wishes aren’t met, stay with how things actually are and be pleasantly surprised.
3. Set some goals about what you’d personally like to get out of the event. They might be things like understanding what your boss sees as the future direction for your unit. Or learning two facilitation techniques from the coach or trainer. Alternatively, set some private goals. Having a long lie on the second morning because you’re not getting up early to commute; using the swimming pool or gym when you’re away; or reading a chapter of your new book when you have some down time.
4. In advance, talk to your friend, partner or child about this event in a way that lightens it for you. Have fun with it. Imagine your boss’s earnestness in trying to re-engage everyone, when you know how critical people are feeling towards her currently. Visualise a colleague getting up to some of his hysterical antics. Laughing about it in advance allows you to empathise with the human side of it, and builds your resources.
5. Avoid the water cooler till after the event. By contrast, bitching about the upcoming workshop with any of your colleagues who are in a less than good place will only depress you. Don’t give yourself that experience.
6. During the event, do something fun. Even if your boss or colleagues aren’t aware of what that is. One idea is to wear some ridiculous underwear – those fabulous red Christmas boxer shorts your aunt gave you last year, or the Agent Provocateur lingerie that makes you feel good about yourself. No-one else needs to know about it. The point is that, when the mask painting is in full swing, or you’re being encouraged to hug papier mache trees, and you’re sinking in what feels like insanity, you can think about how ridiculous your knickers are and inwardly giggle.
7. Resolve to say only what you feel comfortable to say. There’s a big expectation at some team builds that you will get all your baggage out in the open and resolve it. In business, there’s a fine line to walk between saying what you need to say to be understood and productive, and completely unburdening yourself. Remember that, no matter the setting, this is still a corporate event. You have to guard your psychological safety because that’s not often something the trainer will have been trained to think about, or your boss will be worrying about.
8. You may be treated like a child: you don’t have to act like one. Bosses often do the parent thing in corporations. Either they’re doing the arm round your shoulders stuff, when they think that’s going to help things, or they’re doing the harsh, punishing stuff when that’s what they need to do to deliver results. This kind of thing can disable us and make us feel a bit crazy, Wise up to the game and don’t get hooked into it.
9. Take whatever time out is on offer. Go to the gym or pool. Read your book; listen to your iPod music. Or call your friend, partner, child, or dog. Do anything that reminds you that there’s a life awaiting you beyond this offsite, and ground yourself in its reality.
10. Finally, watch what you eat and drink. Coffee, sugar, chocolate and alcohol are all often available on tap during these events. I’m not advocating total abstinence, but I do suggest you watch your consumption. In excess they numb you out. Alcohol in particular can lead you to say and do things that, in the morning, you wish you’d rather not.

Related posts:

1. How to stay in your current job AND enjoy it!
2. How to live more easily with the fear of layoff
3. 7 Warning Signs That It’s Time To Quit Your Job
4. Recession Proof Your Career In 2011
5. How To Re-Engage With Your Job (Even When You’d Really Rather Not)